Oh Ashley, unfortunately, I identify with this so much. While I didn't have Postpartum Psychosis, I had both PPA and PPD with after I had both of my kids. The first one was the worst. I had visions of running out into the slow plow one night. I had a plan and everything. Thank God I fell asleep on the couch that night instead. It was my mother-in-law that saw it for me, of all people. She encouraged me to get help. I did and even though it came back with my next pregnancy, I knew how to identify it easier. Thank you for sharing your story! It is so important that those of us that have lived through these type of postpartum experiences talk about what happened to us.